Author Topic: Having problems working magick without "fronting"  (Read 3380 times)

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July 24, 2009, 07:51:36 AM
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cowen

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Alright, this is going to be weird >.>

I'm unable to do most of anything with magick right now by myself without having to do this thing I do called "fronting". It's a part of a thing I do called soulbonding, which is ... really hard to explain to a magick/psi community since it's neither of those.

Following this link would help explain it,
but it's outdated like all other resources on the subject.

Anyhow, basically, ever since an incident last week when a "soulbond" of mine, Emily, forced one of these said fronts, which is in a sense like a consensual possesion with a friendly entity, or even like invocation in a sense, I haven't been able to do anything with magick or psi except psionic energy manipulation, magick-based seals, and curses (all of which I can pretty much do with thought alone).

But when I front with Emily, I can do all the things I used to be able to do, and twice as efficiently. Another odd thing about this is ever since this happened, my ability to see energy, spirits, and such has gone through the roof, at least for me - I literally see auras around everything and everyone right now, and I can see and hear Emily and other similar entities (henceforth refered to as soulbonds or SBs) near perfectly.

So, what are the thoughts about and/or solutions to this? Chances are I'm going to have to restart my training all over again even if this gets resolved, but I'd like to know what my options are.

But I would like to say one last thing - don't ask me to stop soulbonding or get rid of Emily - I've been soulbonding for longer than I've been doing magick or even psionics. It's a part of my life for that long, and it's really important to me and the SBs I am with.
Nothing is unforgivable. If you deem something as such, you are just not willing to forgive.

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July 24, 2009, 10:08:16 AM
Reply #1

taaraka

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I went to your link but could not find a definition for "soulbond" so I am not sure of what you are referring to or what it is. So if you could give a brief explanation of what this term means, it would be appreciated.

From what could be gleaned from the questions and answers, is you are bonding with another personality that may not be incarnate?

If we look at the big picture of our reality, who and what we are and understand we are connected to everything, every thought, action, etc... If we invoke a personality it is just another part of "us." So in a sense if we bond with another perceived to be separate from our self, we are really communicating/bonding with an aspect of the self...we are communicating with our own soul.

If this personality you speak of is incarnate and is a sensitive or a practitioner, we can be effected by this and have heightened awareness while in their presence. Sometimes this awareness and or abilities can last for some time when not in their presence depending on how open or sensitive we are.

As far as "fronting" I am not sure what is meant by this either...unless it is what is mentioned about being around another sensitive or practitioner.

 

July 24, 2009, 03:30:27 PM
Reply #2

cowen

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My apologies for not explaining it well enough. There are many definitions of a soulbond. Mine is somewhat like this - a soulbond is a nonphysical entity from a parallel universe that one has bonded with on a level of mind, body, and soul. Soulbonds by the definition of that website are either original, meaning they are of a person's design, or borrowed, meaning from someone elses design.

Soulbonding's theory goes along with the multiverse theory of quantum physics, in that there are infinite realities, each one at least slightly different from the other. Soulbonders like myself believe that this can also encompass realities that are based off of what would be considered fictional works in this world, hence why many soulbonders have soulbonds from stories, TV shows, anime, video games, movies, et cetera.

Since soulbonds technically reside in the mind of the soulbonder, most times they are considered to be "in the back", as in, not in control of the soulbonder's body. However, if a soulbonder like myself and a soulbond wish so, the soulbonder can gain control of the physical body, mind, and emotions temporarily by "coming to the front" or fronting. This can result in an altered state of consciousness in a sense, and in my case, it results in them having full reign while I black out memory-wise.

That is, normally I don't remember anything that happens in a front.

What I've learned from mine and my friend's experiences with mixing soulbonding and magick/psionics is that either it amplifies the power by having two forces working together in synchronization, and it may enable/disable certain abilities within a person.

For example, when I front with Emily, my abilities are normally magnified by approximately 50% or greater, especially when it comes to healing, cursing or making constructs. I also am somewhat able to use her abilities, which go along the lines of animal empathy, aerokinetics, and pretty much any of the spells she made up herself. However, when I'm fronted, I end up having her personality, thoughts, and emotions. Technically, I don't know how to explain it without showing you, and I don't feel comfortable doing that outside of MSN.

But when the front ends, either by a lack of focus or when she decides to end it, I regain control and I don't remember a damn thing, at least for a few hours to a day or so, if ever.

But anyways, I tried some of my abilities with weatherworking earlier. Sure enough, any old method I used won't work. My guess is that I'll need to make new methods. I still feel the same way I did before, but little of what I do outside what I said before works.

I even have problems with reiki now, but then again, that's easily fixed by absorbing the energies for it, or absorbing similar ones and then converting them into something similar. I should clarify that my abilities with energy manipulation were apparently not touched, and neither was my innate energy vampirism.

But anyhow, no worries, I think I have it under control now. However, any advice would be appreciated. And if you would like more soulbonding links, or maybe for me to write an article on how soulbonding can work with magick or psionics, I'd be willing to help in any way possible.

And Taaraka  - that site is technically defunct, but here is the full link to the entire website, and the link to the updated version that is also defunct...

The Child of Mana Soulbonding archive, last updated in 2003

-and-

The Soul Whispers website, also archived

Doing a google search on this subject will eventually lead to some more data. Just be careful, some of it leads to Encyclopedia Dramatica's article on this subject.
Nothing is unforgivable. If you deem something as such, you are just not willing to forgive.

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Change is a matter of a little death, and death is only a matter of a little pain. That is why it pains us to change and grow.

July 24, 2009, 06:23:06 PM
Reply #3

Veos

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hmm.   "Soulbounding" sounds like something no magician should ever want to do...  Gonna cause alot of reincarnation, and funky karma, and dependence and possibly psychological problems.   Doesn't seem like it can help in any way or shape. 
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Suddha satchitananda purna parabrahma
Chidananda Rupa Sivoham Sivoham

July 24, 2009, 07:05:05 PM
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Dea

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Doesn't seem like it can help in any way or shape. 
It sounds like a quick fix, kind of like taking an energy supplement for a boost in whatever you're doing. As with taking a supplement, you may get hooked and find that you've gotten so used to the feeling of being boosted with it that you feel weak when not using it. That relative state of mind prevents you from doing things as you had before, instead needing the supplement to accomplish even the easiest of tasks.

July 24, 2009, 07:13:48 PM
Reply #5

cowen

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Guys, I don't even want to reply to those posts. I know what I'm doing. I've been soulbonding for over a decade, being a born multiple. Don't try to correct my actions, don't try to get me to stop. Don't try to influence me either in anyway, especially if you worry about me. Worrying evokes attraction, hence the law of attraction kicks in and suddenly, it's like some goddamn priest is praying over me. Hence, why I've developed a resistance to many, many things.

Now if you excuse me, a more important matter that I actually want to hear input about is at hand. I know I was asking for your help, but frankly, the only person's opinion in this forum that actually matters a lot to me is Sekhmet's. Other than that, don't push me. I have way too much free time.

Lock plz.
Nothing is unforgivable. If you deem something as such, you are just not willing to forgive.

- - -

Change is a matter of a little death, and death is only a matter of a little pain. That is why it pains us to change and grow.

July 24, 2009, 08:48:43 PM
Reply #6

Dea

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Sekhmet is a friend of mine.

I gave you, in my reply to Veos, my opinion on the matter. You've been soulbonding for so long that at the very height (which I assume is with this Emily), you have pretty much embedded yourself in it. Subconsciously, you're preventing yourself from doing anything more without the help of bonding. It was so strong that it just happened in a subtle way.

There's my two cents, and if you really don't want criticism along with help, you really shouldn't have posted on a public forum about it. It's not like we're insulting you, just giving our opinion on it.

July 24, 2009, 08:59:33 PM
Reply #7

Zake

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Interesting.  Cowen's description of "fronting" sounds similar to possession by "loa" in voodoo, and more generally, instances of invocation of random practical spirits to perform various purposes.  Given that its apparently an acceptable practice for a magician to assume the godform of a deity, or invoke lower entities, to tap their power towards practical ends, I don't see exactly what justifies Veos or Dea Kmra in disparaging it outright.  There are more systems for dealing with entities than one can shake a stick at.

That being said, it seems like cowen's primary problem is simply what would be expected of a magician (or whatever cowen considers himself) who relies upon spirits rather than personal development- namely, inconsistent abilities.  Cowen would be well advised to begin training in the style of the magic or psi classes here, or the Initiation Into Hermetics, to stabilize his own personal abilities.
Act; for the universe will never forget your movement, nor will it ever forgive your stillness.

July 24, 2009, 09:48:43 PM
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taaraka

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Well, Ok...I won't pretend to completely understand it, but know everything has a reality. We have teachers in many different forms, but to rely on another for energy or to perform a practice would prove to be a handicap eventually. Maybe this is why you are experiencing this, as an example if you continue to depend on others for everything and don't develop as an individual personality?

Just a thought...


July 25, 2009, 12:32:52 AM
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Dea

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Given that its apparently an acceptable practice for a magician to assume the godform of a deity, or invoke lower entities, to tap their power towards practical ends, I don't see exactly what justifies Veos or Dea Kmra in disparaging it outright.
I wasn't disparaging it, I was just saying it's not good to completely rely on something. I wouldn't promote relying entirely on an entity instead of your own prowess at all, really.

Quote
That being said, it seems like cowen's primary problem is simply what would be expected of a magician (or whatever cowen considers himself) who relies upon spirits rather than personal development- namely, inconsistent abilities.
This is what I was trying to get across. Though, perhaps not in the right words.

July 25, 2009, 06:33:19 AM
Reply #10

Raitaro

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Cowen: The practice doesn't seem to be very well understood here. Perhaps you should write an article. :)
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July 25, 2009, 07:15:52 AM
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Trillis

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Guys, I don't even want to reply to those posts. I know what I'm doing. I've been soulbonding for over a decade, being a born multiple. Don't try to correct my actions, don't try to get me to stop. Don't try to influence me either in anyway, especially if you worry about me. Worrying evokes attraction, hence the law of attraction kicks in and suddenly, it's like some goddamn priest is praying over me. Hence, why I've developed a resistance to many, many things.


Please realize that most of the people's comments here are trying to help us understand, and at the same time trying to let you know based from our experiences that what you're doing in comparison to our practices and beliefs is somewhat contradictory to yourself from what we've learned. After all this is what you do and not what we do, but naturally we as a community can see this as an improper practice from our perspectives and experience. And some of these members such as Veos are very well experienced (I can tell you from first hand and a personal experience with Veos). We're not trying to correct you and we're not trying to get you to stop. you asked us for our advice and you're getting it. We're definitely not trying to influence you unless you think we're trying to convince you, then maybe we are ;). However, the point is people here who are working towards spiritual attainment and magical authority are studying methods that have been around since nearly the beginning of time, and have been researching it and putting it into practice. There is a lot of information, and a very scientific process that we go though, and just as science can show an improper way about achieving something, the same goes for magic.

Now as for my comments go about soulbonding, it sounds to me as a very incorrect way of achieving invocation, I'm sure someone has already said it. My reasoning for this is because during invocation you achieve synergy with the energy of the being that you're allowing to enter into your being and trying to move yourself to a higher state of vibration with allowing yourself to become more knowledge in a certain area. The method of invocation is more about spiritual knowledge and a raising of conscious through interaction with higher beings. But when you use this process to synergize with a seemingly useless entities that gives you slight magical abilities and small clairvoyance, a naturally inexperienced person will think about how great it is to have those small abilities given to them and of course go on with interacting with that entity. And as Veos has already said that it will most definitely end badly for you, whether it be tomorrow or in 5 years. It will eventually happen. Imperfect practice makes your foundation like a castle built on the sand, and the rest like a garbage can.
« Last Edit: July 25, 2009, 07:19:30 AM by Trillis »

July 25, 2009, 03:16:02 PM
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ChezNips

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What it sounds like to me is bonding to a construct because thats what he has implied this to be by describing it as characters from movie, tv and other assorted media.  I'd agree with Veos, not something most magickians would want to do because of all the chaotic mess involved.  What concerns me more is that you have asked for help from some of us with people attacking you from other boards, yet you then ask us to lock a thread because you don't want to explain with the justification that we cannot tell you what to do or convince you in any other way.  I don't understand why people would come to a public forum requesting advice and then refuse to listen to anything because they know better...what's the motivation to start a topic and ask for help when you only want to hear what YOU want to hear?
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July 25, 2009, 05:47:27 PM
Reply #13

Mystan

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I found your post very interesting. Not because I've ever heard of such terms but because I've had similar experience but... from the other side of the fence, as if I was the one being called forward into controll and did things that are normally not possible (or at least I've never been able to do outside of these experiences).

You've given me a possible avenue to explore regarding my own personal experiences that is new, for that I thank you =).

July 26, 2009, 02:12:21 PM
Reply #14

cowen

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My apologies for the drama. I have not been at my best the past week or so, primarily because as I found out today from a friend of mine, I somehow bound myself. And as I have learned, a good binding will make the one who is bound delusional, eventually will drive them insane. The problem has been fixed, as it was a relatively weak binding caused by me "testing" a "potion" I made that was designed to act as an "antimagick" solution.

And it was a success, to be honest. Anyhow, I'll explain soulbonding a bit more thoroughly in an upcoming article. Now to reply to a few select posts, because right now, I'm multitasking between a chat with said friend, an MMORPG, and the constant communication between myself and Emily, Jun, and several other soulbonds, who said they "missed me".

What it sounds like to me is bonding to a construct because thats what he has implied this to be by describing it as characters from movie, tv and other assorted media.  I'd agree with Veos, not something most magickians would want to do because of all the chaotic mess involved.  What concerns me more is that you have asked for help from some of us with people attacking you from other boards, yet you then ask us to lock a thread because you don't want to explain with the justification that we cannot tell you what to do or convince you in any other way.  I don't understand why people would come to a public forum requesting advice and then refuse to listen to anything because they know better...what's the motivation to start a topic and ask for help when you only want to hear what YOU want to hear?

ChezNips, I've been under attack for most of my life, primarily by other people and by celestials. I've been bound several times, and as such, have displayed such chaotic hostility several times. Whenever I am bound, I'm not a person anyone would want to be around online or off. Oddly, bindings wear off of me after about six to ten months or so, but since I'm being held to a pretty high standard offline, I need to be at my best. I apologize for acting this way.

However, I will say that soulbonding is not like an overlay. In fact...

Interesting.  Cowen's description of "fronting" sounds similar to possession by "loa" in voodoo, and more generally, instances of invocation of random practical spirits to perform various purposes.  Given that its apparently an acceptable practice for a magician to assume the godform of a deity, or invoke lower entities, to tap their power towards practical ends, I don't see exactly what justifies Veos or Dea Kmra in disparaging it outright.  There are more systems for dealing with entities than one can shake a stick at.

That being said, it seems like cowen's primary problem is simply what would be expected of a magician (or whatever cowen considers himself) who relies upon spirits rather than personal development- namely, inconsistent abilities.  Cowen would be well advised to begin training in the style of the magic or psi classes here, or the Initiation Into Hermetics, to stabilize his own personal abilities.

The explanation Zake gives is more like it. Essentially, a soulbonder who is engaged in fronting is like being a "horse" with a loa in voudon. Only there are people who aren't magick users who do this all the time. I'm actually outside of the norm in this, as most soulbonders are actually roleplayers, fan fiction writers, and fangirls/fanboys. And while I'm all three of those, I'm also a gray mage, a psionicist, and a reiki master. Hence, I'm out of the norm.

I don't rely on spirits to be honest. I rely more on focii. Hence why sometimes it's really hard for me to do anything without music, a knife, or my pendulum. I almost never conjure spirits, demons, anything. My soulbonds come to me when they want to front, and as such, I allow it if circumstances permit. Even then, it's usually so they can interact with the physical world, talk to one of my friends, eat one of their favorite foods, mundane stuff like that. In fact, only Emily even can begin to use magick or psionics, and that's because A) I've been teaching her, and B) I've known her for about eight to nine years, and as such, she is my best friend, and many times, she has shown me insight I couldn't find myself.

Cowen: The practice doesn't seem to be very well understood here. Perhaps you should write an article. :)

I plan on doing so, and how it can in certain cases help with certain things not related to magick, and probably not related to psionics either even though it can be helpful if you try.

The rest of the posts I'm not replying to at this moment. As I've said, most people who soulbond aren't even interested in magick or psionics. The only reason I mix those two aspects of my life is because Emily is interested in the two. The others either don't understand it or don't like it. As such, I classify soulbonding as non-magickal. If anything, it's not even a practice, but more or less a lifestyle.

Now if you excuse me, I've been away from my game and chat too long.
Nothing is unforgivable. If you deem something as such, you are just not willing to forgive.

- - -

Change is a matter of a little death, and death is only a matter of a little pain. That is why it pains us to change and grow.