Author Topic: Polyamory and soul mates  (Read 936 times)

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August 02, 2016, 04:07:11 AM
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llillith

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I am new in this and have been pondering on it. Polyamory is the practice of intimate relationships where individuals have more partners.
Since I had spiritual experiences, and have been awakened a bit, I have been feeling enormous amount of love, I want to share with people and want to connect. But it led me to a confusion.
If I thrive to accept others as I do myself, I see sex as a way of becoming one with everything, as I feel energies or souls merging. So it is only natural to want it with and for everybody, right? In theory.

In practice, I am disappointed in myself on how much I judge people for their personality, for their looks etc. To the point I feel disconnected again. Why do I still make choices about who do I share myself with? I feel their love but it is one sided and I do not feel the need to connect with them spiritually nor physically.  That leaves me with guilt. Although I am not guilty for them being that way.
If you believe in soul mates, is it not such a selfish and narcissistic concept where you connect only with people on the similar level of consciousness? Is making such choices leading to freedom?

If you did not experience this, I would still love to hear your thoughts about it. You can even answer the same questions only regarding friendships without sex.

August 02, 2016, 02:54:41 PM
Reply #1

Steve

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Body for the body, soul for the soul.

I know that I have a number of biases regarding body types. But I recognize my associations: for instance, I dislike tons of fat on people because it is indicitive of laziness and an unwillingness to be physically active. I dislike strong, bad odours for obvious reasons. Things like that.

The other part of it has to do with social theories and personal space theories. We judge one another because we are careful about who we want to open up to. We are careful about how much we open up to others, and for those people that we do become friendly with, we still divide them into categories based upon how comfortable we are with them: associates, barely friends, friends, close friends, best friends, lover or sibling type friends. On a purely physical level, this can be easily justified by way of protecting yourself from STDs or violent people. Personality wise, this is justifiable to protect yourself from people who are incapable of keeping your secrets safe, or from people who want to emotionally control you, or who are just plain psychopaths that like to hurt people.

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is it not such a selfish and narcissistic concept where you connect only with people on the similar level of consciousness?
Different people are in different situations in life. We are not all at equal points. So I would suggest that you use your feelings of love to get to know individuals better, but without necessarily opening yourself up to the possibility of being hurt, while trying to help them in some way.

Also, just because you like someone doesn't mean you have to have sex with them :P Just like you can have sex with someone you don't like. Sex and intimacy are nice when they go together, but each can be done apart from one another too.

EDIT: And if you feel feelings for people that you don't want to get really intimate with, I would suggest trying to guide those feelings towards compassion, and wanting to help those people in their lives. This will still allow you to interact with them in line with your desires that are being created by your feelings, without needing to judge other people, and thus you won't need to feel the guilt either.

~Steve
« Last Edit: August 02, 2016, 02:58:34 PM by Steve »
Mastery does not occur when you've performed a feat once or twice. Instead, it comes after years of training, when you realize that you no longer notice when you're performing a feat which used to require so much effort. Even walking takes years of training for a human: why not everything else?

August 08, 2016, 08:28:07 AM
Reply #2

Ameer

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The question you wish answered is unclear to me, but I believe what you are saying is you feel guilty about the degree of love you feel for people.

I would say in my practices, I have found I do love all life, including people a great deal more.

As far as polyamory goes I can answer that it is not wrong, as long as all people involved are aware.  Think of it this way, I am gay. What you will find with the gay mentality is, a lot of people are willing to have multiple partners.