Author Topic: Depression and Spiritual Evaluation ?  (Read 2949 times)

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November 07, 2013, 02:41:59 AM
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Mars

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Is it normal for a psion to get at times really depressed ? I find myself constantly reavaluating myself, on a normal level and a spiritual level. There are often questions that nobody can provide a solid answer to and its daunting, I was just wondering if anyone else had gone through the same situation ?

I often find myself feeling down about wishing I could relive some of my days in the past, going through a rather rough spot but I wont bore you with the details of that.

I watched a video about psionics and spirituality, and said it was a normal thing when spiritually awakening and caused through meditation, but I don't see why I should continue to practice if it keeps me down. Problem is I have nothing else, I'm stuck in a boring job doing a boring foundation course to which I already know a lot of the stuff we learn when the class is learning it. (I would be in uni proper now if I properly revised for my test, I revised hard just not hard enough)

What have you guys been through emotionally and mentally when it comes to the realm of psionics, magick and spiritual searching ?
But thanks to you all as you all have helped me, not intentionally but I've enjoyed all the philosophical debates so far its good to have people to discuss it with!
Experience: that most brutal of teachers. But you learn, my God do you learn. -CS Lewis
Cultivation to the mind is as necessary as food to the body. - Marcus T Cicero

November 07, 2013, 01:02:42 PM
Reply #1

Mind_Bender

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You're going to have diffiliculties in life, metaphysical and mundane, it's all about what you take from it and how it effects you in the long run. If something, no matter how much you think you enjoy it, just keeps bringing you and keeping you down no matter what, stop (I had this with a recent qigong and kung fu instructor). If something brings you down yet gives you insight or a new control in your life, than the struggle is just a stepping stone to greater achievements. There is a fine line between struggling to suffer and struggling to evolove.

If psi and magic are just escape routes from a monotonous life than your struggles will probably be worse than someone that has long term and life-affirming goals and reasons for practicing.
"Spirit is in a state of grace forever.
Your reality is only spirit.
Therefore you are in a state of grace forever."

"As relfections of the Source, we are little gods."

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November 07, 2013, 02:07:21 PM
Reply #2

Mars

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You're going to have diffiliculties in life, metaphysical and mundane, it's all about what you take from it and how it effects you in the long run. If something, no matter how much you think you enjoy it, just keeps bringing you and keeping you down no matter what, stop (I had this with a recent qigong and kung fu instructor). If something brings you down yet gives you insight or a new control in your life, than the struggle is just a stepping stone to greater achievements. There is a fine line between struggling to suffer and struggling to evolove.

If psi and magic are just escape routes from a monotonous life than your struggles will probably be worse than someone that has long term and life-affirming goals and reasons for practicing.

I dunno but I doubt it ,I genuinely want to learn I really wanna be the best I can, though there is no fate reason or anything like that that I consciously know of.
Experience: that most brutal of teachers. But you learn, my God do you learn. -CS Lewis
Cultivation to the mind is as necessary as food to the body. - Marcus T Cicero

November 07, 2013, 06:54:05 PM
Reply #3

Mind_Bender

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I'm not talking about fate or any such thing. The will to succeed often comes with a self-defined reason why you want to succeed not just a abstract concept of 'being the best'- Why use magic and psi to be the best? The best what? Most of what you can gain through magic you can gain with charisma and good looks. WIthout a solid goal, whether it be reaching Nirvana or entering congress through sigils and demonic evocations, a goal will help define your path which will help with making the struggles easier or at least worth the while. If there is no goal or destination and you struggle, what are you struggling for? Nothing. This makes your practice self-destructive.

If you are questioning why you are doing magic and find you have no actual need or goal for the magic than there is no rational reason why you should progress; There is probably something else out there for you. If psi and magic are used to uplift your spirits to have better gain over your life such as in all around well-being or to pass on arcane and occult secrets to a new generation of seekers than your doubts are just obstacles that you need to conquer to ensure when future students have hiccups on the way you will know, from direct experience, how to reach beyond and ever so deeply into yourself and be initiated into the chaotic folds of the magical journey. On the other hand, if psi and magic just cause struggle and more suffering you are better off staying in the realm of the mundane and working from there.

In conclusion, even if it gets hard- even grueling- at times, magic, ultimately, should be fun and rewarding in various aspects in life, and I imagine psi would be the same.
"Spirit is in a state of grace forever.
Your reality is only spirit.
Therefore you are in a state of grace forever."

"As relfections of the Source, we are little gods."

"...part of me doesn't want to believe that auto-eroticism while crushing on a doodle (sigil) could manifest a check in the mail box, but hey, it did."

"Everybody laughs the same language."

November 07, 2013, 07:34:04 PM
Reply #4

EllyEve

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Is it normal for a psion to get at times really depressed ? I find myself constantly reavaluating myself, on a normal level and a spiritual level. There are often questions that nobody can provide a solid answer to and its daunting, I was just wondering if anyone else had gone through the same situation ?

I often find myself feeling down about wishing I could relive some of my days in the past, going through a rather rough spot but I wont bore you with the details of that.

Yes, metaphysics is actively dabbling in something beyond the ken of daily life. I suppose the question is personal, whether you feel in over your head because of psionics...or, if you get into psionics because you're in over your head. It was the latter for me, psionics gave me a way to focus and a promise of control. It didn't deliver much on the latter, but I believe it did get me through a rough patch until things were stable again. Of course, by the time it was stable, I didn't notice right away. So that's one main concern about being ungrounded, living too much in the past or anxiety over the future instead of here and now with reasonable reflection and goals.

Quote
I watched a video about psionics and spirituality, and said it was a normal thing when spiritually awakening and caused through meditation, but I don't see why I should continue to practice if it keeps me down.


This depends on your approach to psionics. I try to take a purely results-based take on it: What have I been able to witness out of body that I couldn't have otherwise? How many zener cards do I guess right? Can I do that every single time? Does it work that same way every single time? It's a discipline. It's only a tool that does not, itself, keep you down.

When it gets personal like that, I consider that closer to Shamanism than Psionics. It depends on how you meditate. I believe that Shamanism and Psionics do overlap when it comes to mindscapes. Dream control, for example, is a psionic skill that can be used for entertainment purposes, but dream interpretation (whether you have control or not) can have a very personal commentary and have a greater context than "Can I make this cool thing happen or not?"

Quote
What have you guys been through emotionally and mentally when it comes to the realm of psionics, magick and spiritual searching ?

I say that I consciously took to psionics because I was overcompensating for a sense of powerlessness with the rest of my life, but at the same time I was sort of thrown into it. I've always been sensitive, and psionics had an explanation for it that wasn't just that I was going crazy--and that this "craziness" was something that I could control too. This just so happened to be something I focused on when things in my life that was not only my psychic sensitivity went out of control.

When psionics touches on the mindscape, I've found it to be quite a lot of work. It's significant, so I don't believe it's healthy to repress it--but I recognize that getting to work on this is a luxury. So, yeah, there was some mundane stuff like moving out of a toxic environment, and frankly even getting political about it was a supplement, but with psionics there was... what I guess was a kundalini awakening but since I was awakened by default and grew up struggling with that until I got used to it, it wasn't that much more of a traumatic worldview apocalypse than people who awaken all of a sudden.

I did recognize injuries on a psionic-emotional level, and found a way to heal that. I'm still working on it. I believe that's a luxury, because that's the level of psionics that I believe everybody, even non-psions, are active in--but some deal with it mundanely, while others repress it entirely, and very few deal with the psychic directly in the way you and I do. They're all valid ways of dealing with emotional turmoil: practicality, philosophy, psychism/spirituality, whatever.

November 08, 2013, 02:29:26 AM
Reply #5

Mars

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I'm not talking about fate or any such thing. The will to succeed often comes with a self-defined reason why you want to succeed not just a abstract concept of 'being the best'- Why use magic and psi to be the best? The best what? Most of what you can gain through magic you can gain with charisma and good looks. WIthout a solid goal, whether it be reaching Nirvana or entering congress through sigils and demonic evocations, a goal will help define your path which will help with making the struggles easier or at least worth the while. If there is no goal or destination and you struggle, what are you struggling for? Nothing. This makes your practice self-destructive.

If you are questioning why you are doing magic and find you have no actual need or goal for the magic than there is no rational reason why you should progress; There is probably something else out there for you. If psi and magic are used to uplift your spirits to have better gain over your life such as in all around well-being or to pass on arcane and occult secrets to a new generation of seekers than your doubts are just obstacles that you need to conquer to ensure when future students have hiccups on the way you will know, from direct experience, how to reach beyond and ever so deeply into yourself and be initiated into the chaotic folds of the magical journey. On the other hand, if psi and magic just cause struggle and more suffering you are better off staying in the realm of the mundane and working from there.

In conclusion, even if it gets hard- even grueling- at times, magic, ultimately, should be fun and rewarding in various aspects in life, and I imagine psi would be the same.

Yeah I understand, true but why does everyone believe im just practicing psionics and magic just for whimsical reasons of being at the top of the tree. I have a desire to be spiritual and grow. I like to learn all sorts of things and I just feel like I have to practice for reasons  beyond me. I wasn't having a go...

I guess I also just have a feeling of helplessness on a cosmic scale and I want to find meaning and purpose, something beyond the physical.

I don't even see what I'm saying for people on this forum to karma hammer me so much ?
« Last Edit: November 08, 2013, 02:32:48 AM by Mars »
Experience: that most brutal of teachers. But you learn, my God do you learn. -CS Lewis
Cultivation to the mind is as necessary as food to the body. - Marcus T Cicero

November 08, 2013, 02:46:09 AM
Reply #6

Steve

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So, I have two things to say.

The first is that everyone gets somewhat depressed in some manner, for some periods of time. It's a natural part of human life. It becomes a problem when it starts causing problems in the rest of your life. The idea that depression only affects some people and that those who "suffer" from it are abnormal in some way, seems to cause the normal depression in most people to get worse when they start to think that there is something wrong with them for feeling this otherwise perfectly normal feeling.

The second thing is that you, Mars, seem to be partially depressed because you feel lost. "I guess I also just have a feeling of helplessness on a cosmic scale and I want to find meaning and purpose, something beyond the physical." This is normal, so don't let it get you too down :) Keep searching, because we all are. I'd also suggest picking up a hobby that you enjoy, something to help you feel that you're standing on something solid.

I'd also like to ask, to confirm my guess, but did you grow up reading a lot of adventure novels? I did, and when I grew up and realized that real life is really really boring (the boring job and boring school et al), it was hard to acclimate myself to such a boring reality when I had such fanciful notions of grandeur from fantasy and sci-fi novels. I'm wondering if that affects other people too.

~Steve
Mastery does not occur when you've performed a feat once or twice. Instead, it comes after years of training, when you realize that you no longer notice when you're performing a feat which used to require so much effort. Even walking takes years of training for a human: why not everything else?

November 08, 2013, 02:56:24 AM
Reply #7

Mars

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Thanks for the post Steve

Yeah I would say I did, I always had dreams of adventure, but I believed as a kid that I genuinely had some destiny in life to achieve, I still sort of feel it but I wonder if it was just I liked adventures and I believed it because I loved fantasy and Sci-fi rather than I felt like I had a destiny and something important to do with my life and thats what drew me to fantasy and adventure if you get what I mean ?

I also have a lot of hobbies but things still don't cut it, I do Taekwondo, I make games I mod games, I paint stuff like that and still I just something doesn't feel right.

Thanks you for understanding though :P
I think most people on these forums do not understand me... probably through fault of my own.
Experience: that most brutal of teachers. But you learn, my God do you learn. -CS Lewis
Cultivation to the mind is as necessary as food to the body. - Marcus T Cicero

November 08, 2013, 10:46:22 AM
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kobok

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I've generally found psi extremely beneficial toward emotional issues which arise.  The reasons for this are pretty straightforward and go to the core of the art.  There are two major pillars of things we do with psi, one involving awareness, and the other involving influence.  We obtain awareness of the external world with psi by the method of obtaining awareness of our souls, using this to perceive things.  We obtain influence over the external world with psi by the method of obtaining influence over our souls, and using this to change things.  So the core methods of psi when pursued vigorously result in a deep inner awareness and control.  So when emotional issues DO arise, which they will, we have a special set of skills that we can use to explore within ourselves what the causes of these issues are, and another special set of skills that we can use to address and alleviate the causes of these problems.

A key to this is to realize an important lesson from psi, which is that it starts inside.  Even if you have very significant external problems, your emotional and behavioral response to those problem begins INTERNALLY, and it is THIS that you should strive to address first, as the core aspect of any such problem.
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November 08, 2013, 12:52:46 PM
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Rafnul!

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Mars,

I can't speak specifically about spiritual advice or anything.  I can only imagine that if you are asking about depression, then you probably have a very good reason for asking.  I do not know your life, but you seem like someone who has suffered.  I want you to know that you are not alone.  I don't have any real advice to offer in this thread, but I recently wrote up this description of Depression on Reddit, and you may find it useful.  It doesn't account for anything spiritual, but you may find it informative.

I advise that if you intend to use spiritual tools, you focus on removing sources of stress from your life and filling your life with as many positive experiences as possible. I have no experience with solving depression via psi, so I can't speak to that.  I welcome you to try anything that feels like it works for you.

November 08, 2013, 01:43:06 PM
Reply #10

Mars

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Thanks Rafnul, I don't think I'm usually a depressive person but recently I have been. I focus on using spiritual tools to improve the good aspects of my life, I really enjoy sincere spiritual experiences I just wish to learn a lot also, I think trying to tinker with my mood with psi is likely a risky thing considering my level of skill.

Also thanks for the informative link!
« Last Edit: November 10, 2013, 01:55:09 PM by Mars »
Experience: that most brutal of teachers. But you learn, my God do you learn. -CS Lewis
Cultivation to the mind is as necessary as food to the body. - Marcus T Cicero